You all know Liz from Say Yes to Hoboken. Well she tweeted the other day that her two year-old broke her beautiful lamp (seen below, available at Overstock) and she wanted to know if she should replace it. Would it just get broken again, and end up being a waste of money?
I told her that I would replace the lamp if I were her (and affix it to her table with industrial-strength velcro). But I’m a decorator and probably care more about this sort of stuff than the normal person might. Plus, I have girls (and girly girls, at that), and I have a feeling they are much easier on my house than little boys might be.
Anyway, the situation made me start thinking about the old saying “You can’t have kids AND nice stuff.”
Recently a woman introduced herself to me and said she loves reading my blog for the pretty pictures. Then she said she doesn’t actually decorate her house now because she still has young kids at home. Her pretty things were boxed up for “someday” and her floors and walls were bare. She told me her story all matter-of-fact – like, of course my walls would be bare, I have kids.
Should we just give in and face the fact that our houses are going to be dirty and trashed and undecorated until the kids are in college? Or do we decorate with Raoul and Spitzmiller and then freak on the kids when the inevitable happens?
Do we buy the lamp a second time?
In our house, I try to shoot for a balance between kid-friendly and inexpensive things (that I don’t care about it they get ruined) and then a few special things that I talk to my girls about and set rules for. And then I take a chill pill when those things get messed with on occasion.
What do you think, readers? I’d really love your opinion here for something I’ve got brewing on my back burner. We’ll call it market research.
We don't have kids yet, but we do have 3 mischevious cats. I have found that earthquake putty is amazing for keeping breakables in place. We have a HUGE open bookcase and I stick all the knickknacks down with it and they absolutely will not move. I'm hoping this technique works with the upcoming kiddos too! I would never want to live with a bare house just so my kids don't ruin stuff.
Jenny- We don't as yet have kids, but I find that I don't buy decor for fear of when we have kids it will get ruined. I have just enough to make me think I've got some good decor- at least for now.
I have one daughter- who is 2 and is VERY girly… You have all seen pictures of my house,
http://sketch42blog.com/my-apartment/
it doesnt seem very kid friendly, but on closer inspection, everything really does hold up to her antics…. lucite and glass are very kid friendly, I have a gray velvet couch that definitely shows her milk stains, but its not that bad… white chairs that are microfiber, a cowhide rug… all pretty easy to take care of.
I think the trick is not to have too much stuff. Kids need a little floor space to run around. But I definitely would not change my style because I have a child.
And I dont keep any toys in the living room. She has them all in her room and can take them out and put them back herself.
I did once walk into the living room to find her sitting in a pile of broken vintage glasses, but i was so happy she was unharmed that i didnt give a crap about the glasses…
Wow, this is timely. I have 2 and 4 year old girls and a bun in the oven. My girls are girly girls as well and overall pretty easy on things…until about a month ago. I have no idea why, but for the last month they have been wreaking havoc on my house. They're like my little wrecking crew. And not just on the house, last week my 4 y.o. gave her little sis a haircut. Ugh. This morning they woke up before us and were playing happily until we came downstairs. They had gotten into the markers (washable, thank goodness) and coated the soles of their feet and various other body parts in blue marker. There were cute little blue footprints all over the kitchen floor, and blue smudges all over the slipcover on my sofa. Which brings me to my current decorating preferences. I buy things I love on CL for almost nothing and don't freak if things go awry. I got my Lee industries sofa for free and made a (washable) slipcover for it. I also love a product called folex for cleaning carpet and upholstery-no rinsing required! I've amassed quite a collection of marble lamps but didn't pay more than $50 per pair. Actually, I kind of have a $50 rule with CL- with the exception of my leather hancock & moore sofa and my silk O. Henry House sofa (both via CL) none of the furniture in my house cost more than $50 and much of it was free. There's nothing in my house that I don't love and once my children can be really trusted with nice things I'll do things like reupholster the living rooom sofas. BTW- love the velcro idea!
I have been living in apartments, and other temporary living situations, since I got married four years ago. I never put much effort into these places because, like I said, it was temporary. It wasn't worth it to me because I knew a move was inevitable. The only time I put some effort into an apartment was when my son was born – I made sure his nursery was more exciting than the rest of the place. Well, my son is almost two and we just bought our first house. I am more than ready to finally make our house a home. I'll be busting out paint, wallpaper, and anything else I can get my hands on to make this house personal. That being said, we are still on a very tight budget and we don't have a money tree in the backyard. So my plan is to attempt to make our home stylish, but very kid friendly. AND if I do happen to splurge on some said breakable that I love it will probably find a place in my room or some other space that my two year old son does not frequent. I don't think we moms should have to forego a stylish home until the kids are grown, but we should make smart choices if we have crazy kids running around.
i try to make our place nice, but i wouldn't put anything in there that i would be that upset if it got broken/ruined (i.e. a lamp worth over $100 or a $2,000 rug). i also choose upholstery fabric that is kid-friendly. we had a beautiful ws home sea green velvet couch that went to pot after we had our son so we are having it recovered in something that doesn't show wear as easily. i'd even had a "rule" that you can't sit on that couch with the baby but of course it didn't work out. (he was quite the spitter upper.) i think there is a fine balance, but i wouldn't be spending thousands right now because i'd rather have a comfortable home where kids can roam than something ultra high-end that i am always worrying about getting dirty/ruined/broken.
Your house is your home. All living in it should feel 'at home', that includes you and the children. I have found balance is best. Personality is what tips the scale. Some cannot imagine living without "the lamp" or "the rug" or "___", others relish simplicity. A house full of boys – 5 and no girls, except myself means rocks, legos and dirt have been added or rather have always been a part of our home. Small areas that are made 'just so' – are appreaciated that much more. The living room is comfortable but not untouchable with durablity and longevity being major players in furniture and decor pieces. Final word – Use your head when decorating your FAMILY home. It isn't just yours.
~Beth
I have almost raised 3 boys – 22,18& 16- and have always tried to have a nicely decorated home. Yes things do get broken, but they are just things. My oldest broke an item that had been my mothers once and it upset me something terrible. But worse, was his reaction. It broke his heart to see me upset. I decided then and there that my boys were my legacy, not things. The memories in their hearts were more important to me and that's what I remember most about my mom, time spent with her and not just her things.
I have fairly enthusiastic opinions about this subject. I've worked hard to decorate our house beautifully; we have nice things. We have two daughters, age 5 and 2. It's true that we don't have a son, and perhaps things would be different if we did, but it's my experience and opinion that the better part of parenting is training, and that includes everything you want and need it to include. Nothing in my house has ever been broken by a child. In fact, I let them play with nearly all of it and often find my precious things at the bottom of the dress-up bin, etc. It's part of raising children — they need to really feel free to immerse themselves in their own environment and be at one with it. My girls can do that without breaking things, even at young ages. If other parents find that their children are too rough (even with appropriate training), they should decorate with less precious items. This is not to say that the parents should become Lamp Nazis and constantly harp on their kids about the decor (they *are* just things…), nor is it to say that when they switch out their precious things for less precious things they should makeover the home with a hideous (and sterile) everything's-plastic-because-of-those-crazy-kids aesthetic. It's my belief that children can and should co-exist with beautiful things, and be taught to respect and love them. While we do have nice things, we've also made smart choices: the sofa in our keeping room is leather, for instance, because it's near the table and, realistically, I can't keep sticky fingers off it all the time; all linens in the house are white for easy bleaching; we've used many prints in our fabric choices to hide stains, etc. The bottom line for all parents (I hope!) is that they love their children more than their things, and seek harmonious family relationships over designer decor. Balance and sanity are key in all things, and each family has to decide these things within the parameters of their own situation.
I don't think you have to wait until they're out of the house, but I am one of those minority readers who will probably not buy anything nice until my youngest is at least 3 or 4 and can understand rules a little better. I have a two year old boy now and I would rather hold off a little on buying nice things (not that I don't try and decorate with inexpensive things) instead of feeling like I'm constantly stressed and telling him not to touch things. For example, I don't really like microfiber couches but I think they will keep me sane through the toddler years, so I make due.
I decorate to my heart's content despite my 3 and 2 year old! What we have is mostly thrift store furniture with fabric that can take a beating and the decor is second hand as well or made by me with cheap materials. I've found that putting pretty stuff on walls and around the periphery of the room usually works even if they can reach it (tell them the rule and stick to it) but stuff that's right in their way like on the coffee table is just a loosing battle to try to decorate. No matter how many times they end up in trouble they keep "forgetting" and it's just not worth the time or the breakage to have anything on there right now.
You have to know how to live pretty but still not make your life a constant battle. If I can't live with something breaking it goes up out of their reach, think mantle and such.
I have two young girls who love to run and rough-house with the best of them. (Obviously we encourage appropriate behavior but some days their energy is thru the roof!) I still decorate but they have changed my style. I used to have a lot of knick-knacks which at first I put on higher shelves. But then I didn't have as much time to keep them clean and dusted. So I decided they didn't work for me anymore. But that's ok, I think the evolution of my style is a good thing! Keeps it interesting!
You do decorate & teach kid to respect their surroundings. You probably aren't going to decorate like you're waiting to be in the next magazine spread but you use thing you love & won't be devastated if something gets damaged/destroyed.
Also, kids who know to keep their feet off of furniture, etc. make much better house guests than kids who have no boundaries and your friends will appreciate that :)
Children learn more when exposed to the world which includes valuable breakable things. They can only learn to appreciate these things if they are shown how we as adults handle things. That being said going ballistic over a broken item is wrong too because children are far more important than things. If you save things until your children are grown you may never use the items. Enjoy everything that you own now.
Pat
I take all of the glass out of picture frames. That way I can hang things on the wall, but not be worried about shards of glass shooting into little arms and legs when the frames fall on the ground. The frames WILL fall on the ground. I learned this the hard way.
I wholeheartedly agree that you should not put away "nice" until the children are grown. Children need to learn how to respect and appreciate nice things. That being said, my Lee sofas are slipcovered, most of my throw pillows are washable linens and cottons (the silks are on chairs that don't get "lounged" on a lot). I have three crazy kids and two dirty dogs and we "live" in our home, but it is nice – replace that lamp!
I think there is definitely a limit to what you can expect from children. I remember when my brother innocently swung a plastic bag around (while waiting for his ride to come), lost the his grip, and destroyed my father's inherited Tiffany lamp worth thousands of dollars. It was literally the only nice thing my parents had and they were devastated, but my brother was just being a kid and had one unfortunate mistake with pretty sad consequences (for the lamp). Things that are expensive but replaceable can certainly be out for everyone to enjoy, but one of a kind, sentimental sort of things probably need to be protected a little better so as to lesson the chance of great sorrow when they are ruined.
I have a white couch with three young boys and I have to say the only times it really gets dirty is when other people come over… my boys know better!
so i'll start w/ full disclosure that i do not have kids! i plan to in the next few years, but right now it's just my husband + i in a 2-bedroom apartment.
that said, i hate the idea of resigning yourself to the fact that kids are going to destroy everything + you can't make a beautiful space you love. life is too short!!!!
if kids knock over a table lamp, on the side table next to a couch, could you move it to a different table, where they don't walk by as much? could you swap it out for a beautiful floor lamp or pendant light? if they destroy coffee table blooks, can you move those to a bookshelf? buy a coffee table with a glass top, under which the books could sit?
don't not decorate! just decorate more creatively, to work with your situation. remember, this is where your kids are creating their childhood memories. why not make it beautiful?
xo, jessica
http://www.jessicafulkerson.blogspot.com/
I have four kids, 11, 8, 3 1/2 and 15 months. Since my 11 has been born I've never put things out of his reach. Yes, some things have been broken over the years, sadly not always by my kids. I treat all our belongings with equal value. Most everyone is saying that kids surrounded by the finer things will learn respect for those thing. Well, I must have the only children on earth that don't understand the value of a dollar. The older ones are starting to learn but still don't truly grasp the difference between $5 and $500. So for that reason, everything is treated as irreplaceable, which in some almost every case it is. My more inexpensive items are usually bought at garage sales, flea markets, etc. They've been refinished by me and for that reason are irreplaceable. I buy these items because they make me happy and I enjoy them, no matter the price tag. My more expensive items are irreplaceable because I had to save my money over a period of time and I may not be able to do that again. I do not let my kids have free reign over my house. They have their toys and I have mine. They have their playroom and I have mine. Shoes are not allowed on the furniture, food is not allowed outside the kitchen. If I let my kids act like heathens at my home, they will go to their friends house and act the same way. Case in point, my daughters friend came over and ate a granola bar in my family room with her shoes on the chair. EEK! I love my kids, they definitely are do more and have more than when I was a kid. But they need to know that not everything is replaceable and even if it is, it shouldn't need to be replaced. I hope I don't sound like a complete pshycho, but I guess know that I have kids and see how they're generation is acting, I try just that much harder to instill the values in them that my parents did in me.
Similar comments were made to me this past week, except it was the reverse: "Of course your home is decorated! You don't have any kids. Once you do, be ready to take the glassware down and get rid of the white furniture." I ignored the comments, even though I disagreed wholeheartedly: I will want my children to grow up in a place full of design & creativity! I have no problem accepting fingerprint smudges on my white couch in exchange for inspired living!
yes, you can have nice things with kids.
however, you have to plan for the worst, and teach your children to RESPECT your home and it's contents. whenever i pick out anything for my house, i picture what it will look like after it has been sat on by kids in dirty clothes, touched a gazillion times with grubby hands, and had milk/apple juice spilled on it. if i think it can handle all that, it's cleared for purchase!
maybe it is not so in right now, but I love finding something at a flea market, garage store, thrift store that is well made (looking for dove tailed joints) but would look ok or even good with another dent in it from a sword or skate board, or chipped paint is ok. I don't want to have to replace my stuff once the kids do the damage. Our currently family room has 8 windows that are almost floor to ceiling. My big kids know not to touch them – but the 9 month old does not know better, so we have included washing windows on our chore list- we have to do it more often than we did before she was mobile.
A good balance is best around here. My two year old has a fascination with anything new I bring home but that just means I need to teach him how to take care of it. The rest of my kids are old enough to know how to respect other people and things – especially their home. Home is an important place for us and creating that safe, happy, beautiful place is a goal of mine. Things will always get broken and you just have to deal with it. If you don't want something broken then keep out of reach of the little ones!
Great discussion this morning! I may have been lucky but I never stopped living or decorating when I had my daughter, my motto is she was entering my world not the other way around. I have no doubt boys are more rowdy then girls but I was even able to have candles lit on the coffee table (of course I was in the room)! I think its all about watching them and teaching them and being an active parent. Plus it is being ok if something does break, afterall I'm prone to breaking stuff myself and the items I cherish I put on higher shelves. I never put things away and waited until she got older, I buy things to enjoy them now, like everyone knows you never know what will happen tomorrow!
It depends on the kid!
I have four, very sweet and very different children. My youngest was a holy terror, and yes, I set boundries. She was they type that needed CONTSTANT supervision as a toddler.
There was a while I had to put some things up, but I also found attractive "toys" or containers to replace them with.
Kids???? Try CATS!!!! I've had lamps knocked over countless time due to one cat with a lively, fluffy tail.
But, recently another cat-owner told me about Museum Putty, which she uses to hold down her lamps and she claims it doesn't make a mess!
I found a review here:http://www.viewpoints.com/Collectors-Hold-Museum-Putty-review-a3601
I think there are similar products called museum gel and museum glue, which would be worth looking into.
I have a white sofa, glass breakables within reach, an open plan pantry with glass jars easily accessible and the list goes on. I have a 4-year old boy, who constantly has friends over and I am expecting possibly twins. Kids adapt to boundaries you give them. If you don't want something treated a certain way, say so. Somehow people have decided it's not okay to tell your children how to act around nice things. They are just things. Kids are kids and they learn fast. Which is more important to you?
While I don't have children yet, I am starting to think about my decorating purchases and whether or not they will be child-friendly. I hope I don't have to put everything away for 20 years!
Beautiful picture of you and your daughters!
I have a almost two year old and a 6 month old. The two year old likes to destroy…But, I think I would be silly to not decorate or put thinks where I wanted them because I have kids! I think you have to do things within reason though, Don't leave poisonous plans within eating range, maybe you should wait to put great grandmas antique whatever within reaching level for a few years, but that doesn't mean don't have plants and don't not decorate with things.
I have twins that just turned 2 and a 3 month old. We just bought a new house and need furniture. My new sofas arrived recently upholstered in an oatmeal linen like fabric and people think I'm CA-RAZY! I love, love, love them and I have rules about sippy cups and food in that room.
I love pretty things and waited 34 years to have babies so I'm not waiting any longer to have a nicely decorated home. If (more like, when) things are damaged I'll replace them.
I would say that nice doesn't necessarily equal breakable or stainable. One of my favorite items is a lamp I inherited from my grandmother — it's made of a brass tea jar, so if it got knocked over, it might dent (but a few dents add character!) but it wouldn't break. We have paintings hung on the walls (she can't reach those) and nice furniture (though we're not decorating her room with antiques) and drapes don't get stained. OTOH, if you have a couch upholstered in a light colored OOAK fabric and a toddler who uses it often, you're foolish.
I have a three year old son, and we do have nice things. Not EVERYTHING in our house is nice, and we don't have lots of breakables in the rooms he plays in most, but we teach him boundaries. My opinion is that if a parent thinks she can't have nice things because she's afraid her kids are going to ruin everything, she needs to make more rules and enforce them. I would buy the lamp again. :)
i agree with your opinion. it's like clothes: most mamas say, "i don't wear nice clothes because they'll just get spit up on, slobbered on, ruined, etc…" but you only live once and you can't live in a state of frumpiness or have an ugly house just because of kids. we have nice things that are possible/easy to clean (i.e. wool rugs, washable pillow cases on decorative throws, etc…) and then also have rules about no throwing balls in the house, etc…
I have a nine-month old boy who I suspect is going to grow into a very energetic, rambunctious little boy. That said, I currently do a mix of high and low. I will never have the off limits living room that no one actually lives in, but I also plan on setting boundaries, and being consistent with them.
I go to some friends homes and wonder, do adults live here? They have become giant playrooms. In my living room I have a nicely curated basket of rotating toys. When we are finished playing, everything goes back into the basket. My baby is pretty young still, but I am trying to teach him to respect his toys and his environment. I know that accidents will happen – they already have – and already I don't have the same attachment to my items.
Basically, I personally could not imagine not decorating my home because I have children. There is something very depressing about that to me.
I LOVE this question. We have a 3 year old and another on the way. Two years ago when we purchased an upholstered bed for our bedroom my mom was horrified and said it was "for well-to-do couples with no kids." Happily I can report that 2 years later the headboard is still in pristine condition. Ditto for the cream area rug and white slip covered chair in my daughter's room. of course that doesn't mean all has fared well. the three year old did destroy one of the pair of the lamps in the living room (yet to be replaced) and all the silver and crystal has been moved onto higher shelves and into the dining room.
The trick has been figuring out how to do it smartly. the white glider in her bedroom is a tight slipcover and it has been laundered twice to smashing results. we also have a brown chair in the living room, which is where she is instructed to sit (as opposed to the cream sofa) if is having a snack and wants to watch a tv show.
SURE YOU CAN! i have one almost 2 y o super active boy who likes to knock on my flat screen TV (sigh). see, he doesn't always get it (yet) when i say NO but am not gonna let that be the reason for not having a nice house. i also have coral suede sofa (i know am crazy) but to prevent dirty little handprints, you just have to cover some area with throws or simply clean them. am just not letting the kid be the reason for me to not do this and that – and vice versa. he too can explore his home (within boundaries). i think there will always be solutions, life is too short :)
You just made me so jealous I don't have three girls! You all look gorgeous! So fun to see those sweet faces. I agree with you. Decorating your house makes you feel better!! I have boys and they learn what things are precious. Also your velcro idea is awesome. I need to try that. I couldn't put off decorating, though. I am so much happier with a decorated house. It makes me want to have people over.
Soo exciting you guys are coming up!! Name the day(s) and place and we'll be there!! If I can help with the kids, let me know too. (or if you need someone to photograph your project, I'm on it).
I have an incredibly rambunctious 2 year old boy who is in what my neighbor described perfectly as the 'go fast stage'. He speaks a mile a minute, he runs everywhere he goes and tries to use up every millisecond of time.
However, he's been taught not to touch mommy's nice lamp or the table it sits on. We're still working on my great grandmother's table that sits in my bedroom. My only other really nice piece of furniture (my husband is a grad student) is our couch and shockingly its been adults who have done things to that.
I can't imagine not living in a kid friendly house. But I also can't imagine not being able to aesthetically enjoy my home.
I think your approach is wise. In our case, we have been protective of antiques and less concerned about items requiring regular use -e.g. sofa, beds – that can be replaced easily.
We aim for clean, non-abusive, appropriate use of all household items. Precious items are acknowledged and placed in least accessible spots.
Sometimes things get damaged/broken, and it's not always a child who did it.
Adorable photo with your girls!
I don't have kids but this is a concern for me once I do. Right now I feel like I can't decorate because of my dogs! They are now being locked in a cage all day after finding a spot chewed in my new curtains!
I'm on the nice things team. Sometimes stuff gets ruined but its just stuff.
Holy crap you guys are so cute.
I think having a good balance is the way to go. We have really nice things that i refuse to put away just so my son won't break them. We have taught him what is a "no touch" and that has worked.
We do also have a somewhat inexpensive family room sectional and ottoman that I would love to pitch, but it has been so great with a crazy toddler and the spills/snot/wear and tear that a child can bring.
One thing that I know will get destroyed are great decorative pillows. Our son jumps on them, throws them, drools on them, etc. Someday i will have some gorgeous custom ones made…until then, Pier 1 and Target will have to do!
I grew up with a clear understanding of what “untouchable” meant. However, I was a girly girl and loved my mother’s items as much as she did. However, after my brother was born I remember some items going away. In regards to Tonya and Collin’s comment, he still doesn’t have the same level of respect and admiration for my family’s items whether precious to them or not.
I know that when The Mister and I have children our wool needlepoint rugs will be stored. Currently, I’d love to put up grass cloth wallpaper in our living/dining room but know it is not washable. So, I’m nervous to do so in anticipation.
I have no idea, as I don't have kids. But I DO have dogs who are my babies, and I actually think it's pretty much the same thing! I chose the slipped chairs in my family room because they were a very loud, busy print, because I knew my dogs would be climbing all over them.
i agree, decorate the way you want to and teach your children to be respectful of nice things. but be smart too! if it's REALLY expensive or irreplaceable, put it up high or in a room that kids don't often play in. i also think there are certain things you have to be realistic about as well- like expensive upholstered furniture etc. i LOVE white couches, but for now i won't be putting one in my family room- but i think it would be fine in a formal living room. that sort of thing.
oh. and i'm loving the velcro idea. seriously genius!! i have a couple of expensive lamps that i might do that with- just as a preventative measure!
When I have a baby who is just barely learning to walk, I clear off the end tables of breakable crystal. As soon as they understand "no," it's back on.
Have my kids broken or destroyed things that I love? Yes. But I'd rather enjoy my nice things, and have my family enjoy our nice things, than to look forward to the time when my children are gone because I can "finally" have the house I love.
My girls appreciate beauty so much that it would be hard for them to have a stark "kid-friendly" home. We just talk about certain things are okay to touch, and certain things aren't. And when things break–as they inevitably do–we talk about how people are more important than things, and even though Mommy wishes it didn't break, it's okay.
I think this depends so much on number of children, ages, personalities, and size of home. When I had two kids, the house was as it looked before children. All pretty things out, etc… But then came along twin boys who are much more high-energy than the older kids. Plus we live in 1200 square foot home. I have removed all rugs from the floor, removed all breakables from reach, stored the dining room table & chairs (need floor space), and just simplified in general to bow to the needs of kids. While I understand those who say kids should be used to nice things & learn to treat them properly… this line of thinking, in my experience, has its limits. My home is very small for 6 people and for me, living with less decor = less stress.
I am a believer in setting boundaries with the kids while being realistic. I have two boys who've colored our walls, floors and get play dough and food in every crevice they can find. Life is short so I refuse to give up on decorating my house with pieces they could ruin, although I do lean towards a more casual look anyhow. For example, we have a large ottoman in the living room vs a coffee table. They can climb on it and not get hurt, a win win.
Your family is adorable Jenny.
Should your entire house be filled with "do not touch" pieces?
Absolutely not.
Obviously, children should be comfortable to touch, be active, and act like kids (but not animals)in the MAJORITY of their environment.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking them not to climb on a certain chair, or to take their shoes off in carpeted areas, or not to bring drinks onto upholstered furniture, though.
And, I firmly believe that CHILDREN APPRECIATE AND ARE POSITIVELY INFLUENCED BY LIVING IN A LOVELY, ORGANIZED, CALMING ENVIRONMENT.
Kids are no less able to appreciate art, colors, design, etc., than adults are.
Living in a bare, artless, colorless environment because kids are present is like waiting to go to museums until they're grown, and it SERIOUSLY UNDERESTIMATES their abilities.
I completely agree with your combo-pack of decorating with nice things and things that won't break your heart if broken. I have a two-year-old boy who loves to "kung fu" all over our house…the exception is in our formal living room and dining room. We have nice things scattered throughout out house but those rooms are "off limits." Kids thrive in structured environments. Also, it teaches them to respect what they/we have. My kitchen/den is another story…if grape juice is smeared on my WHITE couch…well, that's my fault. At least it's a slip cover and not upholstered.